“It’s just tempered glass. I can buy a 500-pack of that shit on Amazon for like three bucks.” You’re not wrong, chief. You can also buy 188 McDoubles instead of a tender slab of Wagyu beef. For the price of just twelve and a half McDoubles, you're getting the tastiest tempered glass on the planet. Dinner is served.

Steve Jobs once said, "an imprecise screen protector is like having no screen protector at all." We later learned from the local psych ward that "Steve" was both an impostor and several days into a mescaline trip. Did that make him wrong? Absolutely not. Much like the padded walls of his cell, our Pixel 9 Pro Fold Screen Protector covers every square inch of your display. Thanks, Steve.

Everybody told you that dating apps were painful, but you didn't expect this. Endlessly swiping right against the sides of your cheap, sharp-edged screen protector? Torture. We can help with the swiping, but not your dating life - unless that also needs some polished edges.

Imagine you're a typical human, covered from hand to toe in disgusting oils. Not much of a stretch. Now imagine you bought a nicer smartphone than you deserve. Again, not too far from reality. Lucky for your screen, dbrand Glass has an oleophobic coating to repel your disgusting hand oils. You're welcome.

Take a look at this photo. Let us know what you see. "But dbrand," you're saying, "I can't see anything!" Congratulations, brainlet. You passed the test. See, dbrand Tempered Glass for the Pixel 9 Pro Fold is so optically clear, we didn't even bother trying to capture it on camera.

To ensure a perfect fit, each order comes with two pieces of Tempered Glass: two that are designed for use with the Pixel Fold Grip Case, and two for everyone else.

We've spent more money than the Fed trying to save humans from themselves. The result? Detailed, award-winning tutorial videos that you can watch right here. Once you're finished, you'll understand why we gave ourselves a fake award.